After four days of a sore throat, one mildly itchy, red eye that migrated over to the other and feeling generally crap, I decided to take my first trip to the doctor in Seoul. This was also my first sick day at my school, a scandal to say the least. "What's wrong with teacher Maggie?" At the recommendation of a few friends I called up the International Clinic in Itaewon and headed out for my appointment. It was lodged between a 7Eleven, 5 floors above a delicious smelling Indian restaurant.
I walked into one of the most comfortable waiting rooms in the world. It was cozy and patterned and filled with glorious Konglish signs like "knock the door for answer." This place meant business and there really was minimal talking. "First time" asked the women at the desk and handed me a consultation paper, shooing me away with her perfectly manicured hand. When I finished, I returned it and she extended her hand, I pulled out my health insurance, which she hastily snatched, scanned, stamped and handed back to me. She then guided me through a set of doors into a back room where she set me up to a blood pressure monitor. "this is too high" she said and adjusted my arm, before taking my blood pressure 5 times repeatedly. She poked at my stomach a bit, but seemed satisfied with the lack of fat she might have been suggesting. She then took my height and weight, reweighing me 3 times; a common practice in Korea. Apparently I am deceptively small to weigh as much as I do. She shook her head, called in another nurse who then proceeded to shake her head at me. After about a minute of their simultaneous head shaking they decided they had cast sufficient judgement and sent me in to see the doctor.
The doctors name was doctor Kim, and although he was Korean born and bred he sounded like a spaghetti western version of John Wayne "Have a seat" he said with a slow, Southern drawl. It took everything in my body not to laugh. He looked at me, asked what was wrong and then answered the question himself "you have red eyes. head cold, congestions, feeling tired" I nodded in agreement. "Okay, how long has this been happening?" "about four days." "That's fine" he said, before checking my ears and throat and sending me out of the room to be tested for strep by judgmental nurse A. She sat me down, leaned me back and shoved a long Q-Tip towards my tonsils. "Not enough" she said, before jamming it further back. "You have loose throat, no gag" she smiled and placed the sample inside a tube. I was then ushered back out into the comfortable waiting room, offered a tootsie pop and asked to wait for 10 minutes while they got my results.
"Good news" said Doctor Kim "you don't have strep throat, but you have a bacterial infection in your eye which is making you sick. No worries, your prescription is waiting in the lobby. Have a nice day Maggie!" without missing a beat he opened the door and let me back out into the lobby where my prescription paper was waiting for me. I paid for my visit, a whopping total of $15.00 and picked up my meds (all 3) for $7. My first experience with Korean doctors was pretty steller! I can't imagine going to a doctor in the U.S and being diagnosed, in & out in 25 minutes with a tootsie roll and a bag full of pre-packed drugs! Well played, Korea, well played!
