Is it a log? Is it a rock? No it's my co-teacher!

Warning: Ranty, bitter GIFS about my "co-teacher" who isn't too keen on actually having to do any work. I have nicknamed her Teacher X. After about 9 weeks of laziness, I need a bit of a vent session....in GIF form of course.

Every class with Teacher X

The look I give Teacher X when the students are confused and she makes no attempt to be helpful

When Teacher X asked if she could leave early after showing up 15 minutes late

When my Teacher X starts giving me excuses for why she doesn't help

Teacher X every time I ask her to participate in class

When I can just tell from the look on the other teachers faces that they need to rant about "teacher x"

Teacher X when I ask her any question

My main co-teacher and I celebrating every time Teacher X gets scolded for not working

Desk Warming Playlist

Recently I was asked "What do you listen to while you're desk warming and how do you stay productive." Here is my go to desk warming playlist !

1. Young Kato- Drink, Dance, Play

2. Arctic Monkeys- Knee Socks (although this should say WHOLE ALBUM)

3. J-Boog- Love Me

4. Stan Walker- Unchained Melody

5.Biffy Clyro-Machines

6. La la la by Naughby Boy ft Sam Smith

7. Amy Winehouse- Back to Black

8. True Love- Toots & Maytals

9. Bob Marley- No Woman, No Cry

10. Frank Ocean- Bad Religion

11. Selah Sue-Raggamuffin

12. Wile Belle- Keep You

Suicide Prevention Week: A Letter to Jacob and My Students

"To lie in the soft brown earth, with the grasses waving above one's head, and listen to silence. To have no yesterday, and no to-morrow. To forget time, to forgive life, to be at peace."- Sylvia Plath

When I first met Jacob I was in college, working as a counselor at a fine arts camp. He sprung one of my curls and said "your hair is fabulous," my response was "your face is fabulous."  He gave me a Z-snap and called me "honey" and I knew from that point he was a special kid. I had the pleasure of not only becoming friends with Jacob, but having the opportunity to work with him in my Spoken Word Slam Poetry Course. His writing was unlike anyone I'd ever seen. He was a young man, but he had a very old soul. He wrote things that I hadn't even begun to understand until recently (at age 26) and things I may never understand.

Once I was sitting in the fabric arts center listening to Emiliana Torrini "If you Go Away." He sat down and asked "Why do you listen to such sad music, girlfriend" (He was good at making heavy situations light). I said I listened to it because sometimes I was sad. He seemed surprised and said he was used to seeing me smiling, energetic and upbeat-cheering up the campers. But he nodded his head and said sometimes he was sad too.

I didn't know much about Jacob's experience with depression, but I shared my own with him. All through college I struggled with depression and melancholy and this sense that no matter what I did, nothing would get better. How could it if I didn't even know how to explain what was wrong with me? Sometimes I was just sad for what seemed like no reason at all. He asked me what I did when that happened and I told him I wrote about it. I wrote everything, because the best way to understand my feelings was just to feel them. He agreed that he sometimes felt sad for no reason at all and he felt good about the fact that someone else understood that. I talked with him quite a bit over the next few weeks: about life, Lady Gaga, his crushes, his feelings, passions and those days when he said he just needed to be sad.

I gave him a notebook that he dog-earred and carried around camp everywhere with him. From time to time, he would come into the fabric arts center and read me something new. Each time I was more impressed than before, not just with his words, how articulate or gentle or perfect they were, but with the way he could tell a story; eyes wide, keeping me on the edge of my seat. That was Jacob. He was a story that I would have loved to have read 1000 times. When he was lit up, so was everyone else around him. It's no wonder a gaggle of girls and boys alike, could be found with him, hanging on his every word both fearful of losing that time, but also treasuring the effect that he had on them. Even when he was at his happiest around me, there was sometimes a little something underneath that made me wonder how such a brilliant light ever felt dim. He was actually effervescent.

While going through my Facebook messages this morning I typed Jacob's name in the search bar, curious about the last conversation that we had. In his message he said this: "Thank you for being an amazing teacher to me and being an even more fabulous friend.I don't think you know how important you were in my life this summer. Not just as an amazing writer/counselor/the crazy Maggie Moo but because I can tell you everything and you trust me and tell me how you are sad. (which you shouldn't be because you're amaze balls).You treated me and other campers like we were equals and I wasn't some dumb gay kid (fabulous gay kid) and thanks to you and Sharee for helping me with my Gaga costume and making it fierce. I will miss you at camp next year." My response to Jacob was "Thank you so much for the message it means a lot to me. I will miss you too and your fabulous ways." When I re-read it it didn't seem like enough. I racked my brain thinking of all the things I could have said and the things I wish I would have said. It would go something like this:

Thank you for being such an amazingly positive person in my life, for always being yourself, for being brave enough to tell me about your feelings and strong enough to live with them. Thank you for being one of the biggest reasons I love teaching and working with kids. If you ever feel so sad that you don't want to be here, just remember how much the rest of us need you and love you. Just remember the way we love to hang on your every word and how much your smile can change a persons day, remember you're important and I love you and you aren't alone, but that isn't what I said.

When I found out Jacob had died a month ago, I didn't know the reason, but I hoped and prayed that he didn't take his own life. This morning I awoke to a story shared on Facebook, it confirmed my horrible suspicions that Jacob, had in fact, taken his own life, but it also made me proud to remember such an amazing friend.

Why am I sharing this on a Korea blog? Because suicide is all too relevant in my students lives. Because they are now and will continue to be some of the most important people in my own life. Because I have read statistics about the numerous deaths in my city, just this year and because I work at a middle school where kids tell me on a regular basis that they are so stressed they don't want to live. Some is due to bullying, some is due to the pressures they face to study and do well and some of it is due to untreated/uncared for depression.


It is very taboo to discuss any type of mental illness in Korea and in fact it can prevent you from getting jobs or being accepted to schools. This week is National Suicide prevention week and according to statistics, as I type this another young adult is taking their life. Suicide is the most common cause of death for those under 40 in South Korea.Of the 29,501 suicides in South Korea between 2009 and 2010, the causes were: psychological despair 28.8% (8,489 cases), physical pain 22.6% (6,672), economic difficulties 15.9% (4,690), and family problems 11.4% (3,363).^[12] In cases of youth suicide, the most common cause is pressure related to the College Scholastic Ability Test.^[13]

In a January 2013 article, Ha Kyeo Seob,a professor at the Department of Neuropsychiatry at National University Bundang Hospital and director of Seoul National Hospital, said:

"Most Koreans are still very reluctant to speak about mental illness and to manage mental illness,” he said. “There is a very strong negative stigma toward mental illness and also a very strong negative stigma to suicide.Most Koreans are very reluctant to correlate depression and suicide. From their own experience, they say, ‘yeah, I knew someone who committed suicide but he was not depressed at all. So you know that I cannot say that depression is closely related to suicide."

I do not know what the solution is. I do not know how to treat depression and I know it something I have struggled with and continue to do so. What I do know, is that I love all of these kids as if they were my own. I know that pain is temporary and kids can be impulsive, but I also know that we have to change our attitudes and understanding of the people around us. And I know we have to tell them exactly while what we feel about them while we still can. RIP Jacob. 

5 Days of School Lunch

Doenjang Jjigae, Fried Chicken and Honey Mustard and Oi Kimchi

Bibimbap, Goguma (sweet potato), Tomatoes,Kimchi & Doenjang Jjigae 

Kimchi Spaghetti, Mini Teriyaki Burgers, Salad and Orange Juice

 Fried Fish, Vitamin Yogurt Drink, Sundae Hajangguk, Radish Kimchi & Sigeumchi Namul

 Favorite soup next to Gamjatang!

Bacon, Kimchi Rice, Corn & Potato Salad Rolls, Radish Kimchi, Grapes and Doenjang Jjigae 

What's Going On in Maggie Moo's Classroom

1) My kids got a new seating chart this week. I went through, matched their name and photo and assigned them seats based on how obnoxious they are in class. Haha, it's a shame I didn't do this sooner. Other than the few criers and one minor tantrum, it has been smooth sailing.

How my students feel about the chart.....

2) I stopped resisting using Korean in the classroom "Hangukmal Hajima" (Don't speak Korean) has been my best friend this week.

3) I've had a lot of fun with my students and got their energy level up, simply by coming into class with more energy and actually eating breakfast!

4) We have turned "Partner Conversations" into "K-dramas," which makes kids more excited to participate and encourages them to use English. I honestly can't believe I didn't think of this sooner, it's ridiculous how much smoother partner classes are!

5) I had to punish my first years for the first time, old school style " I will listen in English class"

Usually they are pretty well behaved....

6) We've started an "English Open Mic" where students come in, play some guitar, sing and we have a mini Korea's Got Talent.